Equivalent Exchange

So the first two lines were the kicker. Thought it up last night and didn’t want to lose it. Pretty sure it’ll end up in a story.

You saved one man’s soul
At the cost of poisoning another’s.
We don’t care who we hurt
As long as we feel good
About what we have done.

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Strained and Stressed

My stomach clenches
As I wretch, nothing
Left inside me. My
Eyes grow weary,
I am teary, but I must
Postpone my emotional struggles.

I flee to the gym
And hop on machines,
Flexing my muscles
To exhaustion.
Once I am done,
It’s all been fun,
But mainly the tears,
They transform them.

I rejoice in every tear I cry
Through every pore in my body.
I relish in the glistening layer
Of weeping which makes me shine.
My eyes glaze over, my head it throbs,
It feels like it’s the end. But as I run
And as my head bobs, I flee from
All weights within.

Flow of the River

“There is one river,” the wise man said to the girl. “But there are many paths. You may choose a path for the river.”

“But I can’t right now. There is already a river that flows through here. I need to clean it before I can move on.”

“By not choosing, you also choose. Know a river cannot stop or it stagnates and dies. But do not hate the river for the path you pick.”

“I’ll pick that path later. I’ll bring the river to me, but not yet.”

“Rivers have a way of drying up.”

“It can’t do that to me. The river will wait for me.”

“Rivers wait for no one. You either are on the river, or the river flows forward.”

“That’s not fair! It can’t!” Her face turned red. Her voice raised.

“Do not be angry that the river moves. Do not get angry that you have chosen this path. You are the one not wanting the river. The river has done all it can to wait.” With that the wise man walked off. The river wept.

Rage

You defiled my song,
Yanked on my heart,
Leave me in the dark.

Pulse speeds up,
Vision tunnels,
Teeth chatter.

Uncertainty grips,
My chest clenches,
Stomach vomits,
Head aches.

But this is about me.
Not you.

I take deep breaths, fighting myself.
I pack up my work area, intentionally slow.
I walk out the door, and though the weather is hot,
It feels like a wall of cold water for my soul.

Waiting on the Porch

Dustin sat on the rocking chair overlooking the expansive prairie. He rocked back and forth, watching the horizon, chewing on the end of a long piece of grass. A sigh was released. “Damn it. What am I doing?”

“Wonder that myself.” Grandpa came out onto the porch. “Been wondering that for some time now, boy. What are you doing here?”

“Pondering.”

“Well aren’t you full of shit. Boy, what are you pondering?” Grandpa sat down next to the boy on another rocking chair, using a cane to rock him back and forth.

“Something’s wrong. I was supposed to be motivated. Was supposed to just explode forward again. Wasn’t supposed to hurt like this.”

“Ah, so you’re waiting. Hasn’t been that long, boy, you’ll be fine. Hoping she’ll come to you this time?” Dustin nodded. “Women don’t chase often, son, and you’ve done a great deal of chasing. Maybe it’s time for you to go out there.”

“To find her?”

“No. To find you again. You found you and let it get muddied up. Go clean your damned self off, boy.”

Dustin nodded, “I’ll be back.” He went into the house and came out shortly after with a backpack.

“What are you doing with that, fool boy?”

“I’m going out there.” Dustin shouldered it and started to walk down the stairs.

“To find her?”

“To find whatever God meant me to find. If she does come back, ask her to wait. I won’t be long.” With that, Dustin started walking towards the horizon and into the unknown.

Apparently this is where Dustin is going! Going to be in CT Wednesday and have a free day, so just might take a hike here.

Forgot

I reach to my books for a good time,
To play a game of heroes with strength
We would never know. It was sublime
Until memories were released at length.

A book about the machine god, the one
You bought for me. You never did get to
See it. It looked at me from the shelf, fun
Reminder of what I miss. I’d take you in lieu.

Bookmark in another from the museum
When we saw the Egyptian queen. The back
Had a discount for a diamond ring. Then
We were thinking of it, but now we lack.

As if one break up wasn’t enough, we go through another.
You on another man’s arm, me in a pillow, tears do I smother.