32

I’m 32 today. I feel more and more with the weight of existing and life, that “special” events get more and more bogged down. Maybe it’s age? Christmas doesn’t feel as great, it’s more like one neat day amidst a flurry of really shitty ones. Today’s about the same. No one’s happy. When did that happen? Has it always been that way?

Anyway, while at work the other day, my colleague and friend stated he was nervous about turning 30. I laughed. He said the reason was I rocked 30. Got fit, did a Tough Mudder, went to Guatemala, started my writing career, and stuff. I set the bar high. Unintentional, but it was a nice feeling. I also know he knew that I’ve been riddled with depression and anxiety the past couple weeks. Still feels good to hear.

I’m finally posting for the first time in a long time to set out some goals for me in the following year. Most of these are underway, it’s just sticking to them. To be honest, most of the excitement in my life happened after 30, so I’m going to keep that going. Because if I don’t create it, no one else will.

  1. Lose 40 pounds. I’m a fat ass. This needs to change. All the people saying, “You’re still beautiful,” that’s a fine sentiment. That doesn’t stop me from having a heart attack in the next twenty years because I made poor choices. And I’m not beautiful. Now if you shaved me, I’d have nice boobs, but until then, I’m just a harry fat man.
  2. Make the most of Kenosha. I’m moving. I’m terrified. I’m finally getting into the swing of church, men’s group stuff, working out at my gym, making my apartment clean. Now I’m moving so I can throw all that routine out the window. I’m fairly sure they have a YMCA there, so I’ll be signing up for that to help with the above. I also need to meet people. Real people. That I can see face to face. I don’t like it, but what must be done must be done.
  3. Get my novel published, have at least two short stories for anthologies, have two through Wattpad, have one through Amazon’s KDP. My other site is what this is mostly for, and I made a small business plan to get this going. I was published once in 2015, so now it’s time to open the floodgates and really get my name out there. Garner some fan girls and what not.
  4. Dedicate less time to video games. Like, if I cut it down to an hour a day, I’m making progress. Especially on the weekends.
  5. Friends. I need to make friends. Like above. But there’s an emphasis. Board games. Role playing. Video games. Walking and stuff. Just friends would be good. A girlfriend would be great. I’m pretty sure my apartment would remain clean, but my writing would suffer massively.

I think that’s it. There are my goals for the coming year. I can do it, yes I can.

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