Colleague: Yeah, well I knew about caramel filled apples before you.
Paul: But I have a Kleenex.
C: What? What does that have to do with anything?!
P: If I get a runny nose, I can blow it and you can’t.
C: I’ll just pick it.
P: You can’t pick it if it’s runny.
C: Oh yeah? I just go from one nostril to the other, rub it all over my beard.
P: I bet [your wife] loves that taste. I can imagine it now. “What’s that taste?”
C: She would know. We all know.
P: Ew. No. She was probably eight last time she ate a booger.
C: When’s the last time you ate a booger?
P: I don’t feel comfortable continuing this conversation.
I kid you not. This happened today.